Ris stops, looking around at the congregation, as an existential crisis sets in—proliferating experiences between self-identity warping within the structures of a cognitive dissociation. Hypnotized, she stands huddled among the masses, gazing at the holographic video walls, feeling a little at sea as the DJ conducts his post-architectural symphony; tethered lines between the past and future encapsulating the present; “existing only in this very moment are glimpses of an iota of who I am,” Ris remembers.
“I think it’s time,” Alicia tugs on Ris’s hand, snapping her back into the present moment. The resonance of the bass shakes the warehouse. She nods. “Are you ok?” Alicia yells over the music. Ris nods again.
Still holding Alicia’s hand, they meander in and out of the openings of people towards the right side of the video wall. Beach ball battered souls in the eye of an EDM hurricane, moving around one of the barricades, towards a hallway leading backstage, they finally reach a vacancy of people—a calm refuge from the storm calling them.
A security guard appears out of nowhere and startles them, “Passes?”
Ris looks up, still in a state of dissonance, "Passes?"
"Yeah…passes,” he says, blocking the hallway in front of them. “You have to have passes to go any further.”
"Zer0 is my boyfriend; he didn't mention anything to me about a pass. He said that we’d be on the list,” Alicia says irritated.
“Don’t have a list. No Pass. No Backstage,” he says starkly looking over at Ris’s hypnotic eyes of fractional blues staring at him from behind her lace mask.
“Are you sure we're not on your list?” she smiles at him.
“No Pass. No Backstage,” he says dismissively, turning to walk away.
Ris reaches out and touches his forearm, “Hey, wait a minute, are your eyes two different colors?”
“Um,” he pauses, his body half turned towards Ris, as if unsure he should continue trying to walk away. “Y-yeah, yeah they are. I get that all the time.”
She gestures towards him with her finger so she can talk into his ear, “ It’s heterochromia, right? I have it partially on my left eye! ”
“Um, yeah, I think that’s what it’s called. My dad had it. So I got it now.”
Ris looks surprised, “I got mine from my dad. He has it too! Well, had it…yeah,” taking off her mask to show her left eye.
The guard takes another look over Ris and softens a bit, “Well, if it means anything to you at all, your eyes really are beautiful. I’ve never seen a pattern like that before.”
Smiling at the guard, she tucks her hair behind her ear, “Thanks. Hey, listen, not to sound like a broken record, but this really is Zer0’s girlfriend. We need to speak to him but he's doing his set right now. We can't text him as he uses signal jammers at his events, as you probably know. I mean, what are we supposed to do?” She pauses just long enough to glance at him. “Are you sure there’s not a list in your head you might’ve forgotten about?” She steps back with an award-winning smile.
Stepping aside, he lets them walk across the threshold through the gated arches.
"We will. Thank you so much… What's your name?"
"It's Tyler,” he says with a smile.
"This is Alicia and I'm Ris,” reaching out to shake his hand. "Thank you so much,” smiling as they move past his human barricade.
As they walk down the hallway Alicia turns to Ris, “How do you do that? What did you say to him?”
“It’s a gift, it’s called heterochromia,” she says with a wink.
Moving further into the dimly lit castle, there’s an echoing coming from the vestibule in front of them. As the music reflects off the 17th century walls, Alicia squeezes Ris's hand a little tighter. “So now what? Do you know where we’re going?" she asks.
"Of course. It's a labyrinth, just turn left around this corner ahead," Ris says as a matter of fact. All the while knowing she really has no idea either.
Alicia says half-jokingly, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, now come on,” she says, pulling on Alicia's hand.
A spiral enclosed,
within a sequence of numbers
is the key to understanding
who you are
within the set
that has no members.
The dilation of the set
is a 3 dimensional experience
Based on your perspective
From existence.
Once we find
what’s intertwined,
between the 3 and the 4,
we can then rotate
infinity to nein.
It is the emptiness
between everything and nothing,
that is oscillating
between time.
If you preface the set
of emptiness
With the Devine,
This set still contains an x
that doubles as designed.
Zer0 turns around noticing his visitors. He proceeds to give Alicia a hug and a kiss before turning to say, "Ris is that you?"
"Of course, it is. You didn't think I was going to miss this, did you?" She says, stepping back with a smile.
"Wasn't sure if you could figure the enigma out,” he says sarcastically. "Glad to see you made it."
“Actually, figuring out the code wasn't that hard. I didn’t even need any help from Alicia this time, not like I wouldn’t have found out anyways. You really need to step up your game or you might just get caught,” winking from under her mask. “Although it was quite the trip finding you once we got past the backstage security."
"So, you enjoyed the labyrinth of sound then?" he says smiling.
"Is that what you call it? Never experienced anything like that before, that's for sure. We need to get a couple of passes by the way,” Ris raising her voice to be heard above the music.
Alicia steps forward, "I can't believe that just happened."
"No problem. Wait till you go back out. It will transform you," Zer0 says as he turns back around to change the song, "Welcome to my world!" putting his hands out in front of him.
Ris looking out at the swaying, vibrating, sea of people over Zer0's shoulder seemed to bring with it fragments of memories that seemed familiar, yet at the same time unrecognizable.
Zer0 turns back around with two passes and a drink in his hand, "Here, you ladies should drink some of this."
"What is it?" Alicia says with a serious tone of question.
"Don't worry, it's a tea that some friends of mine make and sell. It's 100 percent made from natural roots and herbs. It will enhance the experience you are already having from the labyrinth without the use of drugs." He smiles with the drink still in his hand.
Ris removes the passes and drink from Zer0's hands and starts to put it to her lips but Alicia grabs her hand, "What are you doing?"
"It's Zer0, I mean he is your boyfriend, right?”
"Really? Do you think that is a good idea Ris?” Alicia says concerned. Looking directly at Zer0, “What the hell are you thinking?”
Not wasting any time, Ris puts the drink to her lips and takes a drink. "This is really delicious. It reminds me of something...You should have some too,” handing the drink to Alicia.
Zer0 hands Alicia a cup for herself. Reluctantly, Alicia takes the drink from his hand. Slowly moving it towards her mouth, Ris yells, "Just drink it already, Jesus!"
“I don’t know about this Ris, considering…”
“Considering what exactly?” Ris replies.
“Well, you know, with all the things…you’ve been experiencing lately,” Alicia says treading lightly.
“Can we please not discuss this right now? I’m really just trying to go out and have some fun and dance all night.”
Still looking for a way out of this, Alicia hesitantly gets the drink to her mouth and tilts it back. "This is really good,” with a surprised look on her face.
“Come on, you know I wouldn't steer you wrong,” Zer0 says, looking directly at Alicia.
“Yeah, well it’s not me I’m really worried about,” Alicia says snidely as she hands the drink back to him.
“Oh, come on. She’ll be fine,” He says as Ris hand the cup back to him.
Looking down at the cup. “It's all yours. I have plenty, plus you’re going to need it where you’re about to go next. It’s going to be a fantastic ride. Enjoy!” raising his own cup in the air to do a toast. “Sometimes we need a little kick in the pants to experience new things. Think of it as a metamorphosis brought to you by the universal consciousness,” Zer0 says, waiting for everyone to toast.
They toast and then Ris grabs Alicia’s hand. “Come on, it’s time to get going and have some fun now.”
“Alright, fine,” she says to Ris.
Alicia hugs Zer0 and as they embrace, she says in his ear, “I still don’t think that was a good idea. We can’t take chances like that.”
Whispering in her ear he replies, “We need her. You have to trust me on this one.”
“I hate to interrupt you love birds, but can we please go dancing?” Ris asks.
“Ok, ok,” Alicia says as she pulls away from Zer0.
Ris hugs Zer0 goodbye and says, “Thank you.”
“Anytime! Let’s get this party going.”
Zer0 turns back and throws up his hands, energizing the crowd during the build-up of the song. The audience starts bouncing up and down in sync with the beat and his motions. His hands resemble that of a 21st century maestro orchestrating the crescendo to the pit of mass below. Letting go of control just as the 32nd notes climb and echo throughout the walls, the song drops in anticipation of the beat that is about to pound through the hearts and minds of all those present.
Zer0 throws these covert parties allowing for others to experience a glimpse of what lies beyond the material world; the Kundalini frequency that gives rise to consciousness. A journey into the manifestation of experiences projecting its energy centres through a 3D world.
“Please don’t…,” Ris interrupts, “Not tonight, ok.”
Alicia looks at Ris. “You’re right. I’m sorry. We are about to experience something, and we don’t know what that might be. So, let’s take a deep breath together and let go and see where this journey takes us.”
Holding hands, they both take a deep breath and exhale.
Just as they exhale, the beat comes back in full force like a roundhouse kick to the chest, banging on the inner rhythm of their souls reminding it… of its presence in this world.
It's at this moment that Ris starts feeling the halo effect of the roots and herbs coursing through her veins down to the capillaries. With nerves tingling and the urge to dance no longer containable inside her mind or her body. She starts moving fast down the corridor with Alicia.
Ris's senses are overloading from the labyrinth of sound. Unaware, she looks in her hand and realizes she is still carrying a cup of the tea. At first, she almost forgets what it is but then she takes another drink from her cup, as if beckoning her…to remember. Not quite able to pinpoint exactly what the taste was she takes another drink, this time the taste on her lips gets the neurons flowing with the memories of an ex-boyfriend's kiss. “Lane,” she says to herself out loud.
More than two years later, and she still struggles letting go. It all ended so abruptly one day. There were no fights, no arguments and no infidelity, just a couple of days after his birthday he tells her, "There's never been anyone that I love and adore more than you. Every day I wake up next to you I feel like the most blessed man in the world, and the way you look at me reminds me of who I really am. I feel like I couldn't ask for more.” She remembers that moment now. It was the last time she truly felt happy. The words he said after that seemed to drift off into a tunnel. Her mind picking out random sentences, "But I'm going to Costa Rica...", was the last clear thing she recalled.
The next part is like a bad dream, “…surfing photographer…something inside of me says I need to go and follow this path…,” tears flow down her face now, holding back the river no more when she vaguely recalls “…our relationship is one I will carry with me for the rest of my life till we find each other again."
The words echo in her head like the music around her, "find each other again." If only he hadn't said those words she'd be able to move on, she thinks to herself.
Over the next couple of weeks things became more difficult as he kept referring to his 're-birthday'. "Since the first moment I felt the ocean beneath my feet, I’ve dreamed of being a photographer out on the waves,” he would say. "It's one of the longest lefts in the world. It’s going to be amazing.” Somehow his excitement didn't quite make it through to her fragmented heart. These were the longest 2 weeks of her life. She tried to enjoy the moments they had together still, but she couldn't. It was always sadly destroyed by the fact he was leaving. She would spend some nights at Alicia’s house just so she could try and not think about it. This didn't work of course, it only just reminded her of what it was going to be like after he left. She was going to be—alone.
The day finally came; dread, fear, love and rejection all wrapped up in one day, September 5th.
She doesn't remember much about the drive to the airport. As they reached the point where there was no going forward for her and no turning back for him, they stopped. Facing each other he spoke first, "I'm sorry, Ris. I can't go on the rest of my life and not know,” wiping the tears away from his eyes and giving her a hug.
Her final objection, “Lane, how can you live and not know about us?" might have struck a chord but if it did, he didn’t show it. “I know I will always wonder,” she said as the tears came rushing out.
"I love you Ris. Always,” sang from his lips one last time as he held her and kissed her.
Her memories fade as he turned and walked through the security checkpoint.
She knows she needs to let go. She just can't because this feeling she's left with in her heart everyday says that it's not over. It's like the unresolved symphony in E Flat by Tchaikovsky—scattered pieces only to be brought together again sometime in the future.
“Don’t cry. I’ll be back shortly to pick you up Ris.” He looks at his friend Stefan, “Just going to test out the new GPS and see if the integration with the computer works properly. Thanks for watching her. It should only take a couple of hours.”
The boat drifts away from the dock as Jon pushes off. He waves as he as talks into a small mini-cassette tape recorder, “Iris, leaving dock on a solo trip at 8:55 am on our birthdays. Testing GPS[. Expected return in 3 hours.” He says out loud to himself as he looks back at Ris and Stefan, “Everything is possible.“as he yells back to them, “There is no destiny. There is only what you create.”
As he continues waving and speaking into the recorder, “Iris, heading to coordinates…(in a Amelia’s voice…89…34…tape distortion)”h and exhale.